i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
I AM A SEXUAL NIGHTMARE
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Randomize
