Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
The way you explained my vagina was exactly the way I would of described my breakfast burrito.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
Watch out, there's a giant vagina in the quad running around screaming at people.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Randomize
