So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
As if me making pizza in a skillet wasn't enough proof that I was in no state to be cooking, this burn blister on my hand is
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
Don't send the creepy guy a picture of your penis. That's my Christmas wish
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
If I was home I'd be ouija boarding the fuck out of the house, haven't been this high since that day
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
