Is it normal to miss your booty call?
last night i told the bartender i only have 3 days left to live so i wouldnt have to pay for drinks
this morning i woke up with a nothing but a pair of what i believe are fairy wings on - and the bartender in my bed
he thinks ill be dead by monday and still came home w me.. WTF?
messed up. what color are the wings?
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
We have so much sex to catch up on
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
I'm drinking vodka out of a water bottle at work. Am I really the best person to come to for life advice?
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
Met a beautiful Irishman two nights in a row. I may never come back.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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