i voted for prop eight dipshit. more weddings = more CAKE.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
Im only pretending to be his friend so I can sleep with his girlfriend.
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Randomize
