I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
Just walked past a girl wearing nothing but flip flops and an oversized sweatshirt crying by the front gates eating pizza. i just found your soulmate.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
That's a good 5 hours of "I have no fucking idea what I did".
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
Randomize
