Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Things bear mace does not do: repel bears. Things bear mace does do: piss off bears, give bystanders asthma attacks. Lesson learned
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
who gets drunk at chipotle by noon and then gets kicked out? this chick.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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