Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
You were plastered and wouldn't stop telling this hot girl about your plan to graffiti a church in easter colored spray-paint saying that Jesus was a Zombie... she kept saying her father was a pastor...
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
Cant leave im designed bacon maker you come here
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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