Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Church boner. Awkwardddd
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
So apparently when he was telling people he was in Alaska for 6 months he was actually in jail
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
You know i'm the father figure
Yeah the father who ate her out with me last night. Great dad
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Randomize
