Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(902): View more from Pr Edwrd Is, Nva Sctia

This guy has a retainer. We're golden.

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(902): This guy has a retainer. We're golden. http://tfl.nu/im2l

Replies (3) Good night (809) Bad night (1982)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night

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(203): I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night http://tfl.nu/hkfs

Replies (43) Good night (10138) Bad night (3061)
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(301): View more from Maryland

The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.

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(301): The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs. http://tfl.nu/e9u8

Replies (28) Good night (3794) Bad night (768)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

did he notice?

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..

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(267): we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself. (215): did he notice? (267): of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up.. http://tfl.nu/7kng

Replies (83) Good night (1811) Bad night (10072)
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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment

(757): View more from Virginia

Personally I think it's a tremendous investment

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(215): I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment (757): Personally I think it's a tremendous investment http://tfl.nu/ikjn

Replies (8) Good night (2826) Bad night (787)
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(210): View more from Texas

i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on

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(210): i just complicated the hell out of my summer by fucking him this early on http://tfl.nu/7n7l

Replies (9) Good night (2876) Bad night (1171)
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(519): View more from Ontario

I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training

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(519): I just had to stop two people giving each other hand jobs in the pool. That was not something I was taught in lifeguard training http://tfl.nu/kvls

Replies (12) Good night (3223) Bad night (1842)
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(805): View more from California

I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard

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(805): I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard http://tfl.nu/np0a

Replies (5) Good night (994) Bad night (1934)
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(660): View more from Missouri

what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate?

(816): View more from Missouri

um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan

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(660): what's the name of the guy at the bank you blew to get the lower interest rate? (816): um. wrong number, but good luck with your loan http://tfl.nu/0tla

Replies (11) Good night (7860) Bad night (1108)
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(316): View more from Kansas

I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.

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(316): I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again. http://tfl.nu/j3xl

Replies (6) Good night (894) Bad night (1255)
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(519): View more from Ontario

you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude

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(519): you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude http://tfl.nu/j4kw

Replies (8) Good night (1708) Bad night (430)
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(314): View more from Missouri

it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him

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(314): it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him http://tfl.nu/nis3

Replies (1) Good night (417) Bad night (1058)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown

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(+44): We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown http://tfl.nu/o3v8

Replies (10) Good night (2103) Bad night (385)
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(561): View more from Florida

I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.

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(561): I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left. http://tfl.nu/6w8g

Replies (4) Good night (965) Bad night (254)
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(734): View more from Michigan

The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"

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(734): The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!" http://tfl.nu/glab

Replies (3) Good night (553) Bad night (221)

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