Texts From Last Night

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  (516): View more from New York

  I woke up on my floor...

  (1-516): View more from New York

  I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop...

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  (516): I woke up on my floor... (1-516): I woke up with colors of the wind playing on repeat on my laptop... http://tfl.nu/u1o5
  Replies (12) Good night (3870) Bad night (692)
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  (347): View more from New York

  Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account.

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  (347): Can I sleep on your couch? My wife just found my eHarmony account. http://tfl.nu/m8a3
  Replies (65) Good night (1501) Bad night (19576)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.

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  (989): Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street. http://tfl.nu/pdx2
  Replies (9) Good night (2677) Bad night (871)
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  (937): View more from Ohio

  Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car.

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  (937): Passed out in a rocking chair on her porch. Woke up to the tow truck taking away my car. http://tfl.nu/1lh8
  Replies (7) Good night (535) Bad night (1845)
• Favorite

  (618): View more from Illinois

  I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today

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  (618): I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today http://tfl.nu/z5b2
  Replies (4) Good night (2142) Bad night (1161)
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  (773): View more from Illinois

  I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me

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  (773): I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me http://tfl.nu/kij5
  Replies (9) Good night (1638) Bad night (841)
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.

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  (419): Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test. http://tfl.nu/jxmi
  Replies (9) Good night (666) Bad night (2225)
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  (916): View more from California

  Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.

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  (916): Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap. http://tfl.nu/pbje
  Replies (9) Good night (460) Bad night (1645)
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  (716): View more from New York

  I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...

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  (716): I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life... http://tfl.nu/ae71
  Replies (5) Good night (818) Bad night (1353)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement

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  (503): You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement http://tfl.nu/tqdd
  Replies (2) Good night (468) Bad night (785)
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  (417): View more from Missouri

  Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you.

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  (417): Nothing makes me happier than finding out someone else is pregnant and it's not you. http://tfl.nu/mj9e
  Replies (11) Good night (966) Bad night (716)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.

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  (541): But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying. http://tfl.nu/1lth
  Replies (5) Good night (1125) Bad night (316)
• Favorite

  (310): View more from California

  That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire...

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  (310): That was the night, like, my hair caught on fire... http://tfl.nu/4kfh
  Replies (2) Good night (236) Bad night (426)
• Favorite

  (306): View more from Saskatchewan

  Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift.

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  (306): Check your mailbox. I left a "sorry I didn't have time to suck your dick today" consolation gift. http://tfl.nu/91xb
  Replies (3) Good night (669) Bad night (202)
• Favorite

  (520): View more from Arizona

  I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game

  (520): View more from Arizona

  Aloha alcoholism.

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  (520): I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game (520): Aloha alcoholism. http://tfl.nu/4jmi
  Replies (0) Good night (582) Bad night (212)

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