they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i just ordered a pitcher of margaritas for me and a friend but she called and canceled. oh well, looks like im getting trashed alone.
the waiter who hardly speaks english told me "i go get your medicine now"
this medicine is soooo good.
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
My god. His mom just smacked my ass. Does this mean I'm accepted??
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Looking back on this weekend, I'm most grateful I never brought up with word "toe-fucking" at the bachelorette party.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
Idk why more people don't drink at work ... i mean, yeah, the cash might be off tonight, but my customer service is fucking phenomenal right now
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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