i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Care to explain why there is sushi in the soap dish in the bathroom
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
I have tasted many bathrooms
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
I woke up with my converse still on and a plate of pasta next to my face, if that gives you any indication of how my night went
Randomize