how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
My stepdad and I just tag-team hit on a server at McDonald's. This is the man I should have grown up with.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
who's idea was it to start the NCAA tournament less than a week after St. Patrick's day? My liver needs time to recover for things like this.
Just found out i over drew my checking account on a 711 hot dog
Do u remember buying that
I remember eating it on the curb like a drunken hobo
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
she's 6'2. you bet your ass i slept with her.
Randomize
