Umm I'm too high to move.
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
No...this little piggys going to the bar
The hot tub didn't work. But it's okay because we discovered just how many people you can fit in a bathtub.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
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