I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
I'm not sure what exactly you were planning, but you kept yelling that we were going to need a lot of midgets and a lawyer.
Nobody feels the need to text me back. Men. And I sent myself a message saying nakedness. I'm all the man I need.
I helped you wax your vagina and you won't even get me Corn Nuts you fucking bitch?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
Just a typical Friday. Dinner, drinks, doing lines with a member of Congress
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