I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I live in Vegas It shouldn’t be this hard to find a penis looking for a night of no strings attached sex
WAIT YOU’VE NEVER BEEN TO COSTCO???
COSTCO IS MAGICAL
I can’t believe you two made a group text to scream at me about Costco.
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