I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
did it hurt when the cum got in your eye
not so much hurt, more like a stinging sinsation like mouthwash
i'm watching a show about a girl who died from masterbating with a carrot. A FUCKING CARROT, EMILY! YOU NEED TO BE CAREFUL!
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
They are making fun of natty and blackberries.
Tell them they are ugly.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
im about to go through the checkout with 3 flasks and a wedding card. let the judgement begin!
update: cashier guessed cash bar before i could say anything. completely bypassed "dry" and knew cash bar right away. i love this state.
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Randomize
