the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
Randomize
