I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
He must be back home now. He moved his box of beer from her porch to ours.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
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