Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
we got back to my place and he started talking about feelings. i politely told him to leave and that he managed to cock block himself.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
Im at that shitty point in my day where I start planning night activities while finger dipping vyvance off of my desk, you got any plans?
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
how soon in a friendship can you start calling them a motherfucker
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
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