I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
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on the subway to an interview & there's a dude doing whippits out of a cheese wil can
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I'm sooo hungover. I fell asleep on top of a car in a parking lot last night. New one to add to the list.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
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I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
My room looks so cute. Who wouldn't want to hook up with me in here?
it was like reliving my childhood drunk at a bar.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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