We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
why do our vaginas work when we are blacked out?? it's just not fair.
should my penis look like a turkey
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
I'm 50% weirded out and 50% into it
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Is it bad i hate my job so much I'm actively trying to get fired tonight by drinking all the booze we have so I don't have to show up for my double tomorrow. Four mango vodkas later I have decided I'm a better server drunk.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
That guy was cool until he tried fighting that dude in the bow tie. I need better wingmen.
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
I can't give advice right now, I have a yeast infection.
Randomize
