make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
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Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
What's sign language for "you may not be the father?" Kinda important right now.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
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I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
I hit a child with a fudge sickle from a moving vehicle after he flipped me off, I feel like a God. Tell no one. My partner didn't see it.
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
I think I broke my toilet with my head. There are ceramic pieces everywhere. and I might still be drunk.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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