You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
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