I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
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I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
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Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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