You smell like stripper and shame
I thought if I stared at him long enough he'd walk me to my car. but he didn't. he dddidn't. i rreally thought i had those powers.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
For the whole 7 seconds I lasted, I was in heaven.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
My walk of shame this morning would have been much less obvious if it hadn't been 6:30 in the morning and I wasn't walking through downtown Nashville in a Steeler jersey.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Direct quote from her that tipped me off I was getting some: "I want to jump on his shoulders and wrap my legs around his face"
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Omg I got up from his bed and almost did a header into the wall because I came so many times I forgot how to walk.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
