Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
I drunk madeout with my mom last night. it's guna be an awkward breakfast.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
What changed your mind?
Being sober
i have officially banned the recreational use of bayonets.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
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