ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Haha I wonder if my burp offended him. So I gave him a fist pump to signify how friendly I am
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
it was fucking weird. cops showed up but they appreciated our 3 story bong. and then some girl tried to steal our cheese and butter
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
Is it a coincidence that the reminder on my phone to take my birth control is "I'm ready to party" from Bridesmaids?
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
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