There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
I might have beaten my fastest all time record going from "I really really like this girl" to "fuck that bitch"
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
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