walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Dude, we took our shirts off and set our chest hair on fire. That's a low point.
You raise a valid concern
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
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