I had sex with him, and then he gave me a $5 Starbucks gift card. Totally worth it
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
he sent me this 10 second long video of a gorilla eating a banana on my phone. no explanation. I didn't even have his number. just. a gorilla eating a banana.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
The party got busted because you two got caught having sex on the neighbors trampoline, come on man.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
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