quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
are you wasted or are you getting laid?
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wow
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Just got a message on OkCupid from a 20-year-old who has "Momma's Boy" tattoed across his chest and thinks the earth is bigger than the sun.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
Last night I was just holding this kitten up to my face for like ten minutes telling it that it couldn't be real
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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