I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
I want to hump her dimples until her face caves in.
So many issues. You honestly need help.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
I feel bad for her. If you sacrifice and have a chubby husband I feel that you assume he's not going to cheat on you....
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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