my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
That female nurse who took a selfie with my man parts well I was out of it just got fired and arrested... You know all she had to do was ask lol
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
Randomize
