The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
I wish I had a dollar for every time I've slept off a late night I dont want to remember in my recliner.
she's into porn, im staying here tonight
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
btw you left your chapstick on the nightstand and bruises on my body...
gifts from me to you. you're welcome.
Apparently it's illegal to hit pedestrians with coke cans... But the cop complimented my arm. That's a win in my book.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Randomize
