I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Reason 37 booty call break ups suck: I literally could not find his house in the daytime.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
I SHIT YOU NOT a mailman helped me leave without waking him up.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Next time I feel awkward in a situation I'm going to just yell "free bird!!!!" Like some redneck at lynyrd skynyrd show
Too bad Amazon Prime wouldn't get the wine bra flask to you in time. Concealed alcohol and huge tits? Win-win.
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
I'll give you a blowjob in a Santa hat if it will put you in the Christmas spirit
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