Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
tiger just fucked it up for all of us...she grabbed my phone this morning and started asking questions.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
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