They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
Don't judge me. It was less weird than it sounds when we were in the moment and it was his birthday
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
Just saw you drinking out of a flask on national tv. I've never been more proud of you
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
He was eating my ass and came up for air, I almost choked laughing because he had a toilet paper cling on stuck in his mustache
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Randomize
