So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
I ran into a wall that clearly had things popping out. My eyebrow was bruised, both arms, the bottom of my foot. Lost half of my finger nail, my fake eyelash was stuck in my hair and I have about 47 blurry pictures of a half naked zombie DJ.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I have a hickey in my new work ID photo.....
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
They already have a joint checking account. She's got his balls in her purse! What's next, a shared Facebook account?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
Randomize
