I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
So how much of last night are we going to pretend never happened? Enough to stay friends?
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
I'm eating a bagel on the toilet and watching porn. Trust me, I've got my priorities straight.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
