Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I'm going to get old and fat one day... probably pretty soon and I'm not going to have any pictures to show to my cats of what I once looked like.
It was marvelous. I was drunkenly conversing with my professor in some of the best Spanish I've ever spoken.
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
but dude how did I get so drunk?
Pretty sure it happened right after you poured a shot of Wild Turkey into your Budweiser, chugged it, and screamed "I. NEVER. BACK. DOWN!"
Apparently his version of saying "I'm Sorry" is streaking around our apartment building then asking for a blow job.....
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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