Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
Lets watch game of thrones and have sex every time someone is naked. It'll be like a drinking game but better.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
My Easter Basket from my parents consisted of one chocolate bunny and a massive amount of condoms and a single note saying "the pope approves of the use of condoms" love mom and dad
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
bonging vodka is the same level of "good idea" as eating machetes
Randomize
