Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
Well, it's 24 hours till finals. I need high A's on all of them and I still am not sure where exactly on campus most of my classes took place.
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
Maybe you should stop dating for awhile if the chicks aren't working out. Reacquaint yourself with your hand or something.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
Came out of blackout state to the curtains torn down & the headboard laid on top of him. & yes he was still breathing
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
