How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
All I want is for every tall lanky young guy who is reading in a Starbucks to go balls deep in me. That's all.
dude i should have never cleaned my ears out while high. theres no going back.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Great night. I'm in the middle of explaining to her how the stock market works and she just rips my pants off and starts blowing me. Nerdiest blowjob ever.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
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