Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
CANT TOUCH THIS JUST CAME ON MY IPOD. LOVE STEVE JOBS
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Now she's making me sit here and look at pictures of guys she likes who look like bears. She's calling them her bear friends.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They just keep looking funny at me. No one has attempted to tell me that I don't make sense though so maybe they're all way more high than I am.
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
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