Porn is love you can see.
Someone shit on the floor
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I look like a herd of wild horses chewed on my back. If you bite me again while taking me from behind, I'm going to have to cut you off.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
He wouldn't let me put a red handprint on his face or scream to him everytime he walked away.
Why did you want to do any of that?
If someones last name is Wilson, you are obligated to pretend that you are Tom Hanks and they are a Volleyball and quote the movie when you speak to them.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize
