She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
I'll name the documentary, "The Adventures of Megan's Vagina"
shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
my momz letting me make the christmas card in photoshop
so that means christmas in space?
imma make our dead cats ghosts like obi wan kenobi
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
We were in the middle of a serious discussion about social justice and he pulled sequins out of his teeth and kept talking like nothing had happened.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
let’s face it, me joining a co-ed soccer league is like, 33% motivated by my crotch seeking a healthy outlet
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
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