we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Drunk me left sober me a shower beer in expectation of Hurricane Harvey. Drunk me is the best.
Don't do it. He's got a dick the size of a baseball bat. You don't want that commitment.
I have to. For the sake of science.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
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