Locked out of the apartment with just a box of wine way to begin the weekend.
I'm like connect-the-dots of drunk. Whiskey, bourbon, vodka, rum, gin. The hidden picture is me faceplanting.
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Training to be a housewife: cleaning the house and masturbating while cookies are in the oven.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
Just passed a girl holding a jar filled with what appeared to be diarrhea
We are so disgustingly codependent and I wouldn't have it any other way
Randomize