did you get engaged???
I fatbooth all their pics then decide which one is the cutest even if they gained like 400 lbs and then proceed to fuck him.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
You put THAT much Jager in me and expect me to realize when things are a bad idea?
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
