he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
my purse only fit my wallet or the martini shaker. it wasnt even a question of which i was bringing.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
Looks like I've become the Walter White of my PhD cohort.
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I like that you're more concerned about how I would find the time to clone you, than the fact that I have your blood.
Randomize